Source extract
Lyra tiptoed up to the hut and peeped in at the window. An old man was laboriously reading a picture-story paper and smoking a pipe, with his spaniel daemon curled up asleep on the table. As she looked, the man got up and brought a blackened kettle from the iron stove and poured some hot water into a cracked mug before settling back with his paper. “Should we ask him to let us in, Pan?” she whispered, but he was distracted; he was a bat, an owl, a wildcat again; she looked all round, catching his panic, and then saw them at the same time as he did: two men running at her, one from each side, the nearer holding a throwing net. Pan uttered a harsh scream and launched himself as a leopard at the closer man’s daemon, a savage-looking fox, bowling her backward and tangling with the man’s legs. The man cursed and dodged aside, and Lyra darted past him toward the open spaces of the wharf. What she mustn’t do was get boxed in a corner. Pan, an eagle now, swooped at her and cried, “Left! Left!” She swerved that way and saw a gap between the coal-spirit barrels and the end of a corrugated iron shed, and darted for it like a bullet. But those throwing nets! She heard a hiss in the air, and past her cheek something lashed and sharply stung, and loathsome tarred strings whipped across her face, her arms, her hands, and tangled and held her, and she fell, snarling and tearing and struggling in vain. “Pan! Pan!” But the fox daemon tore at the cat Pan, and Lyra felt the pain in her own flesh, and sobbed a great cry as he fell. One man was swiftly lashing cords around her, around her limbs, her throat, body, head, bundling her over and over on the wet ground. She was helpless, exactly like a fly being trussed by a spider. Poor hurt Pan was dragging himself toward her, with the fox daemon worrying his back, and he had no strength left to change, even. The whole world grew still as the man tying the net saw it too. Pan sat up and blinked, and then there was a soft thud, and the net man fell choking and gasping right across Lyra, who cried out in horror: that was blood gushing out of him! Running feet, and someone hauled the man away and bent over him; then other hands lifted Lyra, a knife snicked and pulled and the net strings fell away one by one, and she tore them off, spitting, and hurled herself down to cuddle Pan. Kneeling, she twisted to look up at the newcomers. Three dark men, one armed with a bow, the others with knives; and as she turned, the bowman caught his breath. “That en’t Lyra?” A familiar voice, but she couldn’t place it till he stepped forward and the nearest light fell on his face and the hawk daemon on his shoulder. Then she had it. A gyptian! A real Oxford gyptian!
Writing task
What happens next?
Carry on from where the Northern Lights extract finishes. Start with the line, “Then she had it. A gyptian! A real Oxford gyptian!” and continue the story. You don’t have to end the story; write 3–4 detailed paragraphs in which you describe what happens next.
Practise this exact question with personalised feedback on your writing.
Understand the task
The Gyptian recognition creates a precise starting point for Lyra’s next encounter. Keep her curiosity and the scene’s setting consistent while advancing one clear piece of action.
- character continuity
- dialogue
- pacing
- tension
Requirements to keep in mind
Start with the compulsory quoted line; write 3–4 detailed paragraphs; ending optional.
Plan your response
- Copy the required opening line exactly.
- Stay with Lyra and Pan’s immediate situation.
- Use three or four detailed paragraphs.
- Build tension using actions and dialogue.
- You do not need to finish the whole adventure.
Check your response against the task requirements. Leave time to review sentence clarity, punctuation and spelling.
Original atoply example response
Written by atoply, not an official school answer or mark scheme. Other successful responses are possible.
Reveal example and teaching notes
Then she had it. A gyptian! A real Oxford gyptian! Lyra scrambled to her feet, holding Pan close against her chest. “You know me?” she demanded. The bowman lowered his weapon and nodded. “We’ve been looking all over for you,” he said, his eyes flicking towards the silent wharf. “But this is no place to talk.”
A distant whistle sounded between the warehouses. Pan changed into a tiny mouse and hid inside Lyra’s coat. “There are more of them,” he whispered. The gyptian with the bow pointed towards a narrow boat rocking beside the jetty. Together they hurried through the mist, keeping close to the walls.
Just as Lyra reached the boat, a shout rang out behind them. A lantern swung into view, followed by heavy footsteps. “Get aboard!” urged the bowman. Lyra jumped down, landing on a heap of damp rope, while one of the men pushed the boat away from the shore. The river seized it and carried it into the darkness.
Only when the wharf had vanished did Lyra dare to breathe properly. “Where are you taking me?” she asked. The gyptian glanced at his companions before answering. “Somewhere you can hear the truth.” Pan stirred uneasily beside her. Whatever the truth was, Lyra suspected it would be far more dangerous than the river they had just crossed.
Learn from the example
- The response reconnects with the source characters and situation instead of retelling the extract. This helps the new writing feel like part of the same scene.
- Compare the narrator, tense and first action with the passage's final moment. Keep any compulsory opening and paragraph limit when writing your own continuation.