Ralph and the Beautiful Island - The Perse Upper School 11+
Source passage (adapted)
The shore was fledged with palm trees. These stood or leaned or reclined against the light and their green feathers were a hundred feet up in the air. The ground beneath them was a bank covered with coarse grass, torn everywhere by the upheavals of fallen trees, scattered with decaying coconuts and palm saplings. Behind this was the darkness of the forest proper and the open space of the scar. Ralph stood, one hand against a grey trunk, and screwed up his eyes against the shimmering water. Out there, perhaps a mile away, the white surf flinked on a coral reef, and beyond that the open sea was dark blue. Within the irregular arc of coral the lagoon was still as a mountain lake--blue of all shades and shadowy green and purple. The beach between the palm terrace and the water was a thin stick, endless apparently, for to Ralph's left the perspectives of palm and beach and water drew to a point at infinity; and always, almost visible, was the heat.
He jumped down from the terrace. The sand was thick over his black shoes and the heat hit him. He became conscious of the weight of clothes, kicked his shoes off fiercely and ripped off each stocking with its elastic garter in a single movement. Then he leapt back on the terrace, pulled off his shirt, and stood there among the skull-like coconuts with green shadows from the palms and the forest sliding over his skin. He undid the snake-clasp of his belt, lugged off his shorts and stood there, looking at the dazzling beach and the water.
Writing instruction
Continue the story from this point, with a focus on the beauty and perfection of the desert island. You don't need to write the entire story, just the next section.
Things you could include might be:
- Describe more of the island setting
- Explore Ralph's feelings on the island
- Describe what Ralph does next
💡 Writing Tips
- •
- Continue immediately after Ralph looks at the beach.
- •
- Keep the passage’s beautiful, tropical atmosphere.
- •
- Use the lagoon, coral, palms and heat as starting details.
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- Show Ralph’s growing feelings through what he notices.
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- Write the next section, not a complete new adventure.
📝 Sample Answer
Ralph stepped from the shade of the palms and felt the sand give way beneath his feet. It was so fine that it slipped between his toes like flour. The sea lay before him in bands of blue and turquoise, each colour brighter than the last.
A breeze travelled over the lagoon, carrying the clean, sharp smell of salt. Beneath the clear water, tiny fish flickered around a patch of coral. Ralph crouched to watch them, forgetting for a moment the uncomfortable heat on his shoulders.
There were sounds everywhere once he began to listen: the steady hush of waves against the reef, the scratch of palm leaves overhead and the faint tapping of a bird somewhere inside the forest. A bright butterfly crossed his shadow and vanished among the flowers.
He walked along the water's edge, leaving a trail of footprints that the next wave washed away. The island seemed to stretch endlessly in both directions. Its loneliness ought to have troubled him, yet the shining sea and the warm sand filled him with an excitement he could hardly explain.
Near the lagoon he found a cluster of smooth white shells. He chose one and held it up to the light. Its curved surface glowed softly in his palm.
Ralph looked towards the distant point of the beach. Perhaps there was more to discover beyond it. He placed the shell carefully on a rock, then set off along the shore.
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